I know you mean well, but please stop this madness. I am trying to take life seriously, exercise regularly, eat well, get enough sleep and keep things generally together. However, you have not stopped throwing fun ridiculousness in my direction and it is getting out of hand. How am I supposed to do my laundry when you keep me up until 4am doing karaoke on a regular basis? I have had no time to be sad, wallow or even feel sorry for myself, because you are so persistent. This selfish behaviour must cease, before my happiness level reaches that of an unhealthy level. You are putting me into a state where my cheeks might be stuck to my ears in a permanent grin. This is a serious risk, and because of it, I am almost worried about my future physical appearance. I have not had time to write about all the fun wonderful things happening on a weekly basis, as you suddenly and quite arrogantly busy me with the next lot of it. This again is a terrible scenario, how will I possibly remember all of the best memories of my #bestlifeever when you don't even allow me that?
keep up the good work. You selfish beast.